Monday 29 September 2014

Blood Swept Lands and Seas of Red

Blood Swept Lands and Seas of Red
This is a really difficult post to write for a number of reasons. So you will have to stick with me whilst I work my way through it. 

The intention of writing this post is not to make you sad but my hope is to remind you that life can change very quickly. 

It is important to not become complacent of this fact and make the most of every opportunity you are given and love and forgive the people around you. 

This is a very different post from my normal ones, I will share some things with you that you may not want to think about. So if you don't want to stick around for it I understand. I won't judge you, you can go away and come back when there will be a happy post that will follow this.   

September marks a very sad time for our family. It is the month in which we lost our dad to brain cancer. As this is a space that I share my life with you all, it would seem wrong to skate over this part of my life and not share it with you. 

This year as a family we decided to do something different on the 16th of September, to remember my dad. Our plan was to go and visit the Blood Swept Lands and Seas of Red exhibition at the Tower of London. 

As a foodie family unsurprisingly our morning started at the Breakfast Club at London Bridge.  

Breakfast Club
The Breakfast Club
The Breakfast Club
For drinks we opted for two smoothies. Slow Boy - apple, carrot, orange & ginger (£4.20).

Virgin Apple Mojito - pressed apple, mint and lime (£4.30). The Mojito is so wonderfully refreshing and a definite favourite. 
The Breakfast Club
The Breakfast Club
My dad used to enjoy a lovely cooked breakfast when he got the opportunity. So my choice was easy, I opt for the "The All American" breakfast - Pancakes, eggs, sausage, home-style fried potatoes, streaky bacon and maple syrup (£10.50).
The Breakfast Club
After breakfast we wandered along the Thames enjoying the fresh air and walking off our rather large breakfast. Tower Bridge is an iconic monument of London that I will never get fed up of seeing. 
Tower Bridge
The bridge is the guardian over the water, raising and lowering to allow ships in and out of the city.  
Tower Bridge
The architecture is so very beautiful. 
Tower Bridge

I don't know about you, but when I was a child probably around eleven or twelve I became aware that people don't live forever. It was a realisation at the time that greatly disturbed me, it was something as a child I could not imagine and did not want to comprehend. I remember my mum telling me that this wasn't something I would need to worry about for a very long time, drawing reference to my Grandmother who at the time was in her seventies fit and healthy.

I remember the months in which my dad became unwell like they were yesterday, it was June not long after I had celebrated a milestone Birthday. The year became memorable for all the wrong reasons. 
Blood Swept Lands and Seas of Red
Having been previously fit and healthy (having the constitution of a cast iron ox), illness came suddenly to my dad and within three months of diagnosis he sadly went from a fit independent adult, to one that couldn't walk, feed himself or care for himself any more. I cannot describe those months, they were dark and horrendous, time went very slowly and watching the person that you love die in front of your eyes is truly awful. It changes you in a way I am not sure you recover from. 

Within three months of diagnosis my dad sadly lost his battle to brain cancer (Central Nervous System Lymphoma) on September 16th 2010. 
Blood Swept Lands and Seas of Red
They were the very worst days of my life and yet I would live them all again, as it would mean I would have time with my dad again. Time. We spend vast amounts of time wishing it away but when someone puts limitations on it you wish you could have it forever. One second, a minute, an hour, a day, a week, a fortnight, a month, a year. Oh what I wouldn't give. 
Tower of London
I am not standing in judgement here I too used to get caught up in the moment, worrying about things that really in a couple of hours, weeks or even a year wouldn't matter. I still do, it is very easy to do and forget about what life is really all about. 
Tower of London
The exhibition was the perfect place for quiet reflection and remembering my dad. The exhibition is amazingly poignant.
Blood Swept Lands and Seas of Red

"It's difficult to understand the sum of a persons life... Some people would tell you it's measured by the ones left behind, some believe it can be measured in faith, some say by love, other folks say life has no meaning at all... Me, I believe you measure yourself by the people who measure themselves by you..." - The Bucket List (2007 Rob Reiner).

As my father's daughter I certainly measure myself by my dad, who was a wonderful unassuming man who if I can ever be half the person he was I will have done very well. 

 photo foodieforce_32.jpg

19 comments:

  1. Life is so short, unpredictable and very precious. I'm so sorry for your loss, I can't even imagine how hard it must be :( Simon lost his Dad 5 years ago. I never got to meet him but we talk about him often, I really love hearing stories about him and imagining what he was like. I love that we keep his memory alive. Sometimes it is very difficult though, only yesterday Simon broke down in tears in the cinema when we saw a film that triggered painful memories :(

    I'm glad you had such a wonderful day celebrating his life, he definitely would have approved of the Breakfast Club!

    Sending you love and hugs xx

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    1. It is indeed and it very easy to forget what it is all about. When you loose a parent early you can help
      but feel cheated. Sorry for Simons loss I bet he is glad that he has you to make
      him smile and fill with food ;-) x

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  2. Lucy, I am so sorry to hear that. Wishing you all the best

    Suze

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  3. Lucy your post has a beautiful message at it's core, one that I think we often forget. I'm sorry for your loss, I can't imagine how hard losing your dad must have been, it was brave of you to share your story here. The exhibition sounds like a wonderful place to take the time to remember him, and your breakfast looked delicious and I'm sure he would have approved.

    Sending lots of love to you and your family, xxx

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    1. The exhibition is so very beautiful and poignant. We had a lovely day Lucy x

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  4. I'm so sorry about your dad, this was a really lovely way to remember him. Sending lots of love, I'm sure this was a difficult post to write x

    Josie’s Journal

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    1. Thanks Josie hope you are feeling better x

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  5. This brought so much tears to my eyes.

    I, too, had those same fears about death as a child. I still do. Unlike you, I've been lucky enough not to lose a parent.

    Death is the scariest thing I can think about, so much so that it can consume me.

    That place looks amazing.

    Corinne x
    www.skinnedcartree.com

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    1. Ah Corrine, it does suck and it is the one thing that we can all be certain will happen to all of us at some
      point. Only pearl of wisdom is make the most of them whilst they are here. Also learn about them, this probably sounds strange but as children your relationship is different as an adult make sure you know about their past, your family and funny stories that they to share. I have many questions I wish I had asked x

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  6. I'm so sorry to hear this lovely :( what a beautiful day you spent with your family to remember your dad. Life is precious<3

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  7. Dear Lucy,

    your post is very sad, but I took it as a lesson. I tried to understand how it feels when you lost a person that you love so much. You are a great person and I am truly glad you have only good thoughts about your lovely dad, not all children have such dads. You are blessed my dear and thank God for it.

    I believe your dad is watching you from there and he is proud of you (the lovely daughter).

    PS: I love your this post!!!

    Warm hugs and kisses,
    Liuba xxx

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    1. Liuba you are such a sweet heart I hope one day I get to meet you Lucy x

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  8. I'm sorry for your loss, Lucy. It really is difficult losing a loved one, especially to something as devastating as cancer. I believe he is there watching over you and all your successes. I"m sure he is very proud of you. I've lost a few friends whose lives were cut short, it is really hard to deal with. Time never erases that kind of pain or loss. However, their lives always bring you greater perspective. It makes you want to be better, do better, and live life as wonderfully as you can. Life is short. It is a nerve-racking concept, but we just have to be the best version of us as we can. I'm glad you were able to remember your dad in such a beautiful place.

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    1. Thank you. Wise words and very true, it is important not to waste time and be the best we can. Sorry for your losses too Lucy x

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  9. What a very brave post to write Lucy. I'm so sorry to read about the struggle that you all had. What a super way to celebrate his life though! I'm sure he'd have been mighty proud of your breakfast decision!

    Love and thoughts to you, Marie X

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    1. Marie he would have loved the breakfast that is for sure thanks for your message Lucy x

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  10. A truly lovely post Lucy; life is so short, but it's all about the memories and experiences you share with your loved ones, sure your dad would have loved your breakfast :-)

    x Roch & Tash x
    www.next-route-style.blogspot.co.uk

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